Love Thy Neighbor?

I'm pretty sure I read somewhere that someone important suggested (maybe commanded) I love my neighbor as I love myself. Something to that effect. I believe in that. It's sensible, thoughtful, and healthy.

However.

My next door neighbor's dog is barking outside. This is not unusual. It's almost noon, so that's better than when he barks from six to six-thirty in the morning or eleven-thirty to midnight. Still, it has been ten minutes of the dog barking at passing people, dogs, and sometimes cars and leaves. The bark is deep and strong. Were I a good person, I'd think of him as Walt Whitman sounding his barbaric yawp across the rooftops of the world.

I just think he's a pain in the ass.

I suppose I sound mean and petty. (I can play that role.) For several years I've not loved or even liked my neighbor. I don't hate her, so there's that at least. And just so I come off a little better, I blame the dog's faults on the neighbor. A dog doesn't know any better.

I like dogs. We have one, but she hardly barks. The two exceptions are the single bark to let us know she's ready to come in from the yard and a few seconds of bat-shit crazy barking when the little dog in the house above ours goes off. Our dog sprints up the hill to the fence, they bark like mad, then they settle in for wagging and smelling.

I don't mind that little dog, but I don't. He used to bark a lot, but I knocked on their door and asked "do you think you could bring him in when he barks?" They did. Since then, no problems. I love my neighbor as my dog loves theirs.

The next door neighbor won't change. I've asked. A couple times. Politely. But it doesn't occur to her that the barking is a problem. Some neighbors aren't on the same wave length of thoughtfulness.

None of this is the end of the world or cause for hatred, but I don't much love my neighbor. Not that one at least.

Still, today when she walks her dog, I'll say hello from a safe distance and ask how she's doing. It's the neighborly thing to do and right now we need as much of that as we can muster.

Woof-woof.

New Routine

Happy Saint Patrick's Day. I know that's usually written "St. Patrick" but an extra "saint" in the world is better than an abbreviation. I have very little understanding of who Saint Patrick was and am a little suspicious of those who "bring" Christianity to believers of other things, but I like to think there's good in this world and that we learn from that, so Happy Saint Patrick's Day.

I'm on the couch listening to Vince Guaraldi & Bola Sete. Usually by now I'd have taken my daughter to school and gone in to the office, but schools and the office are closed. I need a new routine.

Routine gets a bad rap — Stuck in a rut. Same old, same old — but routine provides comfort and rhythm. Last night I went to bed at the usual time. This morning I got up about as usual. I made a cup of coffee and wrote my Morning Pages. That has been my routine for years. I'll continue it.

After Morning Pages I usually shave, shower, dress, and go to work. I'll work from home for the foreseeable future, but I still shaved and will shower and dress once my daughters are awake. Shaving reminds me that I still have obligations (mostly to myself) and the power to respond instead of just reacting. My smooth face (though I try not to touch it) reminds me I'm not just alive but I'm living. There's a difference.

I'm on the couch typing this, testing if it could become routine, writing a morning blog post.

I can't tell what my new routine will be. I try things and see how they feel. Today it's sitting on the couch under a blanket listening to Guaraldi & Bola while typing a post about routine. Tomorrow may bring something else. I'll move in and out of things until I get into a groove. Developing a routine takes patience, time, acceptance, and the determination to create a routine.

Creative people are good models for this. A friend has worked in the arts for years. No boss, no time clock, no regular paycheck, but he has a routine he follows pretty regularly. That's how he gets the work done and getting the work done is what he most wants to do. Routine allows him to explore and create.

Routine helps me go through my days and not let them pass me by. Routine comforts and helps me feel as if I'm doing something good.

This morning I wrote three pages by hand which is always good. I shaved so I look at least a little bit good. Now I've sat on the couch and typed something that may be good to others. The routine feels good and feeling good is something I need, something we're all going to need. Routinely.

Recommended Reading

If I had a good way to search old blog posts, I'd know when I last recommended Leo Babauta's Zen Habits, but since I don't, I'll just recommend it again. So there.

This morning I read his "Coming Back To Powerful Habits" twice. I often read his essays twice, not because they're tough reads — he's a clear writer — but because I get something from those second readings.

It helps that I agree with most of what he says. The "Coming Back" post is about returning, a theme I've hammered at often of late. I also like that he's forgiving, encouraging, and not didactic. He admits his failings and doesn't trumpet his successes. He's humble and generous, two qualities I admire in others and try to encourage in myself. Reading his posts helps with that.

We are likely to be cooped up some for a few weeks needing good things to read. Skip Twitter and Facebook for heaven's sake. Read Babauta and this bgfay guy instead. You won't regret it.

Assignments

The schools around us are closing. My daughter's school is trying to hold out until Friday. Some of their reasons are good. The schools are the primary meal service for many city children and arrangements must be made to feed them. Some of their reasons aren't as good. There's the idea that schooling has to continue. Let's face that schooling will be limited-to-nonexistent over the next month or two (or three). I say close the schools immediately, take aggressive action to flatten the curve, then address feeding the kids, but I'm not in charge of anyone but myself and my child, so there's that.

A couple schools are opening Monday so students can get homework and technology . I get that and kind of support it though I still think we need to be much more aggressive responding to this virus. I also have little faith in homework making much difference. Still, as a recovering English teacher, I have ideas about what I would assign.

1. Send them with a couple books. I'd grab a few class sets of books and give each kid a couple. While separated physically we might connect a little around the same text. I'm not stupid enough to think every kid would read these things and don't care about getting everyone. It might be a comfort and use for some of them and that's good enough.

2. More books. Raid the library for a couple hundred books and get kids to choose two. If they read them, great. If they think about reading them, okay. If they don't read them, that's fine too. The books would be there in case they tired of Instagram. (Yeah, right.) I'd send no assignment with the books other than to take them and maybe read for fun. Crazy thought, I know.

3. If I had them, I would send every kid home with a fresh notebook to write while we are out of school. A page a day, but don't get stuck on the numbers. Write when you see, read, hear, or say something interesting. Paste into it. Draw. Write what you think and feel. Write questions, answers, plans, fears, and dreams. Just write. Create a record of this time in your lives.

4. Do some kindness for someone. Stay eight feet away but make contact. Call, text, send video. Leave food outside someone's door. Do secret, anonymous good deeds. Write it all in your notebook.

5. Don't sweat school. You'll learn more during this experience than you'd ever could in my damn classroom. Be strong, be brave, be curious, and for God's sake wash your hands.

Then I'd tell them to get the hell out and go home. School closed, I'd pack my things, wash my hands, and return to my family to wait this thing out, write, read, and hope for the best.